When I work with leaders, our conversations often start with the whirlwind of today—the challenges they’re navigating, the pressure to deliver, the teams they’re managing, and the strategies they’re refining. And understandably so. There’s a lot coming at leaders right now.
But one of the most important roles I play as a coach is to help them lift their gaze beyond today’s fire drills. To pause the urgency just long enough to ask: Where are you going? And are you building the team, the function, and the strong relationships today that will support that future?
In today’s complex, fast-moving environment, strong relationships are no longer a nice-to-have. They’re a differentiator. A strategy. A lifeline. And they’re often what separates leaders who thrive in ambiguity from those who feel stuck in it.
We often think of leadership in terms of output—decisions made, goals hit, change managed. But beneath every major achievement is a network of relationships that either helped get it done or made it harder.
Years ago, I heard someone describe relationships at work like a bank account. You make deposits by showing up, following through, being helpful, building trust. And yes, you make withdrawals—especially when things go sideways, the stakes are high, or you need support.
That metaphor stuck with me throughout my corporate career—especially in my operational roles where I was constantly supporting sales and execution. I knew that in times of high pressure, I’d need to rely on others. And if I hadn’t made enough deposits? Those asks would come up short.
I called them “chits.” You never want to be in a storm with no chits in the bank.
Building strong relationships used to be something that happened over time—through projects, hallway chats, shared experiences. But let’s be real: the world of work looks very different today. Hybrid environments, heavier workloads, and increasingly matrixed organizations mean that relationships don’t build themselves anymore.
In fact, they often get de-prioritized.
That’s a mistake.
Because the complexity we’re navigating today means our relational bank accounts are being depleted faster than ever. The volume of change, the demand for cross-functional collaboration, and the sheer speed of decision-making require a new level of relationship equity.
So instead of hoping relationships will form organically, I encourage leaders to be intentional about building them—strategically, proactively, and authentically.
Let’s talk about how relationships are built today. In my coaching conversations, I’ve found that strong, strategic relationships form in three main areas:
One challenge I hear often from leaders is that building relationships feels awkward. Do I just randomly set up a coffee chat with someone? Won’t that seem strange?
Maybe. But when done with intention, it doesn’t have to.
Start with those you already collaborate with. Set up brief check-ins that include space for more than just status updates. Ask how you can support their priorities. Use your existing network—your inner circle—to help connect you with others.
Think of it like networking, but within your own organization.
As Korn Ferry recently shared in their article, "5 Ways to Be Sure Your Boss Sees Your Good Work“, many professionals feel uncomfortable promoting themselves or asking others to advocate for them. But enrolling your close-in circle in your success is not self-serving—it’s strategic. And it’s part of building that bank account.
If you’ve built trust with someone, let them know what you’re working toward. Ask if they’d be willing to share your contributions, advocate for your work, or make introductions to help expand your impact. You’re not asking for favors—you’re cultivating relationship equity.
Final Thought:
The complexity of leadership isn’t going away. If anything, it’s increasing. But your relationships—your leadership bank account—can be your most powerful asset.
Be intentional. Build early. And remember: the leaders who thrive in today’s world aren’t just managing tasks—they’re nurturing connection.
Let’s build something together.
If you're looking to elevate your leadership impact by strengthening your relationships and influence across your organization, I’d love to connect.
